We have a beach trip planned this Saturday through Tuesday, Dan and Stacy arrive on March 5, my Blessingway is March 6, home visit with the midwives and Kelly (Doggie Doula), and then Dave and I are taking advantage of a free downtown hotel stay (with the dogs) on the 12th. After that, baby can come. By that time I'll be past the 38 week mark and feeling confident in baby's breathing, digestion, coordination and size.
I still have some things to take care of around the house; deep clean a few more rooms, get some computer work done, research who we want to use for an MD and ND for baby...that kind of stuff. We also have one more childbirth education session to complete.
I won't say that I worry about early labor, but every week that I advance in my pregnancy I have a sigh of relief that there have been no preterm labor signs. By this time I am not worried about baby's survival outside the womb, but it is not a legal time to have a homebirth. Baby needs to wait until 35 and half weeks (with doctor permission) to be born at home. Plus, it's really just a good idea for baby to stay inside a few more weeks to make feeding a lot easier.
My emotional state is becoming increasingly teary. It's like I don't have room inside myself for both a baby and tamped emotions (which is a great thing). The other morning I had a dream that Dave cheated on me with a German woman. When I told him about the dream he said that he, as a whole, doesn't find German women attractive and would never cheat on me with someone he wasn't attracted to. While this kind of comment would usually make me laugh, I got really upset. I spent the next 20 minutes crying, okay it was actually sobbing, with Dave comforting me.
Fortunately, Dave has been awesome about everything. I mean really, really awesome. My last crying jag happened a few days earlier when Satchel frustrated me to no end because he wouldn't lay down. I couldn't seem to let go of the anger, went to bed, had a bad night sleep, woke up pissed and then had another mini-sob session with Dave. Everything seems to feel better after a good cry.
I'd have to say the best (and really I think there has only been these three times) was a few weeks ago when I got so very upset that Dave decided to go to bed before me and didn't let me know that's what he was getting ready to do. Part of me knew I was being totally irrational and crazy but the rest of me couldn't do anything about it. I went to the bathroom and cried until I felt better. And again, Dave was great through it all.
I've been drinking a lot of whole chocolate milk lately. Love it. If I let myself I could probably drink an entire quart in a day, but if I did that I fear I would gross myself out and hate it. So I pace myself. Before pregnancy the last time I drank milk was in middle school. I always hated it. Now, and probably because it's chocolate, it's my thing.
Anytime I dream about a baby it's a boy. Last night I dreamt that I was breastfeeding our son (he latched well but never for long) who had lots of brown hair and was born on March 17 (second dream that baby was born in March). Despite these reoccurring dreams, I just don't buy it. I still say girl all the way.
Physically, things are going well. I'm sleeping wonderfully - meaning I get up 3 times a night to pee and usually drink Recharge because I'm so dehydrated and then I fall back asleep again. I'm still eating a snack in the morning then going back to bed on the couch.
My lower back is great, but my mid-back does get tight. If I sit upright too long (like now) it starts to hurt. Recently, I've had to start watching TV in a reclining position, which is actually quite wonderful because most of the time Dave rubs my feet while we watch Jersey Shore or the X-Files.
The skin on my arms is super dry and flaky. Not sure why this is but it's kinda gross, so I'm trying not to look at it too often. No amount of oil will make it any better. When this happened about 10 weeks ago I put Bag Balm on it and that helped, but that stuff is nasty, so I'm saving my liver and not putting it on during pregnancy.
Hmm, what else? I've noticed a definite pattern where I don't have a strong appetite for a few days every other week or so. During that time I eat when I'm not hungry and eat foods that I'm not into because I'm not really into anything at all. This definitely bums me out. But then it changes all of a sudden and I love everything I'm eating (which is the same as what I always eat) and I'm hungry every few hours. Being hungry makes eating so much easier.
I have never been able to palpate baby's head, but baby let me feel it on Thursday (it was cute and tiny). When I woke up the next day and bent over to put my pants on there was baby feeling much lower than usual. Since baby has always been low, I didn't experience a sudden ability to breathe deeper or eat bigger meals. I also haven't felt any extra bladder or rectum pressure now that baby has dropped since I've had that for a long time now. I'm still a little unsure of baby actually did drop, but I'm feeling like he or she did. We'll see what the midwives have to say.
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